Excerpts Of The President's Remarks To The Radio And Television Correspondents Dinner Tonight

I want to thank you for this opportunity to tell all the jokes that weren’t funny enough for me to use when we did this five weeks ago. 

In Egypt, we had the opportunity to tour the pyramids.   And by now I’m sure you’ve all seen the pictures of Rahm on that camel.  I admit, I was a little nervous about the whole situation.  I said at the time, "This is a wild animal known to bite, kick, and spit.  And who knows what the camel could do?"

Of course, most of my attention has been focused back home.  As you know, we’ve been working around the clock on to repair our major financial institutions and our auto companies.  But you probably wouldn’t understand the concept of troubled industries, working as you do in radio and television. 

One problem we’re trying to solve is the high cost of health care in America.  And I’m pleased that in our quest to reform the health care system, I have gained the support of the American Medical Association.  It proves true the old expression that it’s easier to catch flies with honey.  And if honey doesn’t work, feel free to use an open palm and a swift, downward wrist motion.